its been a month..almost

so..ive been 30 for almost a month now and so much has happened and changed..its unreal!  one of the biggest is that i have finally come to terms with the kids being waitlisted for a school we applied to rather than accepted.  it took months for this to happen in my head.  i was so upset, angry, irriated, confused, and blown away.  i felt like someone was telling me that my kids werent good enough..when in reality it just wasnt meant to be.  clearly that is not the place for them.  personally..i think my kids are too good for that school.  if they cant see the amazingness that is dalton and chloe..poo on them!  im so mature..?!  but really..after tons of conversations..mostly with me in tears..with my mom and kevin i finally understand and accept that the school they are supposed to go to will come along and they will get in and we will love love love it!  i think at this point i am more relieved that they did not get accepted becase i constantly felt judged every time we went to the school..meetings, classes, interviews, etc.  and i for sure dont want to feel like i am on stage performing each time my kids go to school or each meeting or conference we have for them.  i want it to feel like their current school..acceptance, open doors, comfort, and respect.  i wish their school still went through fifth grade..boo!

dalton has been in play therapy and group therapy once a week since november and january respectively and he has been making slow but steady progress.  he is there for a variety of reasons..and so that kevin and i can learn how to best help him and handle his borderline diagnoses and hopefully head them off.  ive encountered mixed responses regarding having my 3 1/2 year old in therapy..and to those who do not agree with it i am perfectly fine with your opinion and i respect it.  at the same time those people do not truly know my son and clearly do not know kevin and me.  we do everything for our children..and this is one of those things that needs to be done for him in order to give him the best way to understand himself and help him learn how to handle his intelligence, energy, emotions, and focus.  we have learned so much about him and about ourselves through his therapy.  i am a huge supporter of mental health..therapy..etc.  i am highly against throwing pills at a child and hoping the problem will go away.  i know if dalton was in a different school environment we would have been told numerous times already that he has adhd and needs meds.  i can 100% say right now that he does not..but he is on the border..and we are crossing our fingers that he advances further away from the border than crosses it and we get a full blown diagnosis of that and other things. 

we have been recently presented with the possibility of a sensory processing disorder..and i almost broke down in tears.  i feel so badly for dalton and all that he has on his plate already and now something new.  he has so many balls up in the air and he is trying to control each and every one and now to throw yet another at him..its just not fair.  but..thats just me and my insecurities.  dalton doesnt see things like that..hes just goes on day-by-day trying his hardest to control everything and begging to go play outside and do puzzles and erupting because he cant do extended day work but has to nap at that time instead.  after talking to his therapist and doing some reading on the subject..its not the end of the world.  honestly..my ocd is a bigger hurdle to overcome.  i feel like i better understand dalton already after reading only a few pages of a recommended book:  the out-of-sync child.  group therapy ends next week..play therapy continues..and i think we are going to need to set up an ot evaluation for dalton in the coming weeks.  ideally id like to give him some time off before we start something new..i mean it is summer!

honestly..im just thankful i have a husband who is accepting of the fact that his son needs an extra hand to help guide him to fuly understand himself and his capabilities and possibilities.  and to admit that we as parents need some help to help him.  and the future has so mcuh in store for dalton..we just have to wait and see if he will use his powers for good or evil.

heres a link where i found some great info about spd..i had no idea what is was until it was recently mentioned by daltons psychologist.  http://www.sinetwork.org/

our family has grown by 4 in the last month..rabbits..giant rabbits.  the kids named them:  hop, mopsy, knufflebunny, and trixie.  mopsy is the only girl.  yes world..trixie is a boy.  they have been a handful!  oh my word i had no idea.  but the kids love them..so the copeland farm just continues to grow.  i keep telling the rabbits they are lucky theyre so pretty.  but..i think having such a variety of pets has helped show the kids how to handle animals, how to love them and respect them, and it has taught them responsibility.  they help feed the dogs most days and they go with me to take the rabbits veggies most days.  dalton loves to pet them and tries to pick them up all the time.  chloe on the other hand..she just wants to look at them.  and yell their names..loudly.  love those kids.  each day is an adventure with them..and our farm.

a lot of things have become apparent and a number of other things have been learned as of late.  things are looking up at the moment..and my fingers are crossed that they continue on that track.

i hope to become more personal and not merely skim the surface of things as my blog progresses.  i still have not yet found my blogging groove.  im still in the stream of consciousness-talk about the everyday and not my thoughts, fears, etc. place.  we shall see i suppose.  i find it a victory that i actually started this thing.  most of everything is on facebook..its so much easier than a blog..and takes much less time.  but i am finding this blog to be calming..reassuring..an outlet..and i appreciate that.

until next time.peace out.

we went to froberg farms in alvin last weekend..had a great time!  love this pic.